We’re better in a bundle than on the fringes.

Photo by Brett Sayles from Pexels

It's easy to find venomous attitudes that masquerade as manhood but that are mostly a mask for resentment. Turn on talk radio, scan Twitter, look at the spectacle in the streets of American cities and at the podiums and lecterns of small towns. We're told all that noise is manhood, but it's suspiciously frail, fearful, and weak.

Manhood can't be conferred by a group. Political factions, cults, gangs, militias—these don't make us men. They're distractions. There's no store-bought manhood. Some kid who shoots up a protest hasn't graduated into being a man; he's failed at it.

Nor is manhood a bundle of anger and resentment while ridiculing all other emotions as not tough enough. We can be tough AND unscrew our emotional life. Finally, denigrating women isn't a masculine calling card. Men who do that are weak, afraid, and faking it in the name of the rest of us.

We don't have to go LOOKING for our manhood to prove it. All of that suggests a dearth of community that went out with the neighborhood pub. So we're here to create some genuine community—to put the pub back in our neighborhood.

Asher Black

Asher is a fabulist, maximist, humorist, and raconteur. By day, he works with companies to find and tell their story effectively. By night, he is a human bonfire.

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6 thoughts on “We’re better in a bundle than on the fringes.”

  1. A study by the University of Pennsylvania found that simply by sitting with other men you’re able to reduce the level of testosterone and cortisol in your body. Men have to do their own thing. If they want to get together, they need to find an event that is not only for women, but also something that men can enjoy. I want a community that’s centered around truth and love, not hatred, anger, or fear. I want a place to talk about anything men want to talk about, without the bullshit talk that can sometimes come up on other platforms.

  2. I think community among men is essential to understanding manhood itself. When we spend time with other men who share our interests, hobbies or passions, it allows us to discover aspects of our masculinity that are not often discussed. I think that men today are more disconnected from each other than ever before. We have more disposable income and technology makes it easier to stay in touch with friends and family, but we’re not as close as we used to be. I want a community of men that isn’t distorted by crazy talk, but we can relax and talk about anything.

    1. Bogan Alejandrin

      Men are social creatures. We are taught to be independent from a very young age, and to be strong by themselves. Being together as men is essential to understanding manhood itself. One of my biggest pet peeves is seeing single men hang out at bars or clubs. I want a community of men that isn’t distorted by crazy talk, but we can relax and talk about anything. I want to be able to discuss reality-based issues with people who aren’t just talking about problems they’ve created themselves.

      1. Having these conversations about manhood will help you understand your role and the role of the other male. Men used to gather at bars, clubs, and pubs together to talk and relax. Nowadays, men just don’t seem to have time for each other. It is important to have a community of men who are not just your costumers, but friends too.

  3. Being together as men, like in a pub, is essential to understanding manhood itself. Boys are socialized to be together with other boys and this can help to shape the way they understand masculinity.
    I think there’s a lack of opportunities for men to get together these days except around sports and work. Dudes, I want a community of men that isn’t distorted by crazy talk, but we can relax and talk about anything.

    1. Being with your mates is essential to understand the male perspective on life and manhood. I think there are fewer opportunities for men to get together socially these days, especially around sports and work. I would like to see a community where men can relax and talk about anything. I’m tired of the crazy talk that goes on in a lot of online communities.

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